Daily Calorie Goal: 1200 or less
Total calories eaten today: Over 2000 (Long work night on Mondays. Too much random snacking; UGH.)
Mondays are my longest day of the week. I start work around 10:00 a.m. and I'm at the lab until 8:30 p.m. My hubby takes baby home on Mondays, and I stay and work late so I can pick the teenager and her cousin up from St. Scholastica at 9:00 p.m., when they both finish their DSSO group practices. I enjoy my Mondays most of the time. It gives me some "brain time," time to mentally sort out my week, think about projects I'm in the middle of or projects I might like to start. It's the only few hours all week when I am completely, utterly by myself. I relish this time for the absolute silence and relaxation of it.
|This is the teenager's 4th year playing in a DSSO youth group.|
I always try. I usually do really well until Monday afternoon. By 4:00, I've almost always kept my calorie intake to a minimum, somewhere around 600 by that point. Mondays at the lab are so busy, this isn't normally tough to do. As long as I can keep myself from unconscious eating, as in putting bites of things in my mouth randomly as I'm running around working, I do OK.
It's the evenings that are the killer for me. I always try to plan for this, especially on Mondays, when I know I'll be at work late and needing to eat some kind of supper there, and I try to plan every bite and every calorie so that I don't blow it after doing well all day long.
Sometimes I succeed. Sometimes I crash and burn.
Tonight was the latter.
I felt like I was starving all day today. My stomach was killing me. It didn't even feel like hunger pangs alone; it was more like hungry-plus-nausea. Not fun. I tried to decode the feeling all day. Hot tea helped, coffee made it worse. This one is a no-brainer, actually. Coffee always gives me a gut-ache, but I like coffee, so some days, I drink a cup - but no more than one. Two cups of coffee has me doubled over, for real.
|LOVE coffee, especially the smell of it. HATE the inevitable gut-ache.|
So I nibbled. And by the end of the day, I am positive that I exceeded 2000 calories over-all, though I stopped counting sometime around 4:00 p.m. <sigh>
Today is the 22nd day of my diet and my blog, and I'm floundering with it. (The diet, not the blog.) Yeah, sometimes it takes me a day or more to get my blog entries updated and current, but I'm having a lot of fun with it. It really does motivate me to write it all down, and to "own up" to the hurdles and the food screw-ups when they happen. It also helps me to be able to go back and read previous posts, and any comments. After all, why am I blogging this crap, anyway? Because I'm hoping, in whatever small way, that it will HELP me. I'm like anyone else; I have a task in front of me - to lose the unwanted pounds I've been lugging around for almost 3 years - and I'm having problems finding the magic formula that will make it happen. I know that I'm in the same fat-boat as countless other people on this planet. The difference with me is, I'm miserable with this extra weight, and a lot of other people out there seem not to care if they're fat or not. Maybe that's an incorrect assumption. I have no idea. Maybe every fat person on earth is miserable about their weight. And I'll never know for sure, because there are so many millions of over-weight people on this planet, it would take me weeks to email them all and ask them.
|Well, she LOOKS happy... But IS she, really???|